Three Things Your Boss Will Tell You About Aiming For Success

If you have 30 minutes to talk with your CEO at fireside, what topics will you bring up? I bet the questions would be about his success path. How did he make his way to the top? What differences he have made to achieve target? What driven him the most?

I once had the opportunity to ask such questions. The man in power sure has a lot of experience to share. Stories were told, lessons were learned, and traits were shared. Hearing his speech was like reading a motivation book. He gave three key points he feels affected him along the road to his success.

1. Focus on your goal. What should be the goal here is what really matters to you. Something that cannot get out of your head, something that you feel is the most important to you. No matter how distractive your surroundings, your mind will always get back to it. No matter how difficult it might seem, you will always try to succeed it.
2. Be competent in your work. Be irreplaceable. Go extra mile to learn different approach to make things more efficient. Be acknowledged for your expertise. Learn third language, take new project, travel to new places, grab the challenge, anything to expand your experience and shape your skills.
3. Execute your plan. You will never know how good a plan is until you start carrying it out. You never know how good a dream is until you make it a reality. Start immediately and you will feel the urge to finish it immediately as well. One tip to remember: always listen to your guts. Spontaneous decision is usually the best decision.

Shocktober

September was nice and full of blessings. I am truly grateful for beautiful moments and adventures I had with family and friends. I wish October would be nice too. However, a man may plan his way, but God directs his steps. I have plans and personal goals and hopes until the end of year 2014, but what really happened took my dreams further away. Once there was a clear aim, but in one mistake, I screwed it. Once there was a good chance, but in a blink of eyes, I couldn't make it. It was all due to unfortunate events I couldn't help but to cry. The Coldplay "Fix You" song now makes sense to me.

(x) I'm pursuing a virtual running challenge to be on the top 3, to put the most kilometer efforts, but then my health dropped into illness I had to take rest for at least one full week. It feels pathetic to restrain the desire of running while seeing my friends were running freely.

(x) I'm applying scholarships for master's degree, but then the company offered me training that I have to follow next year. Only few months left to prepare, I'm not sure if I am ready for this.

(x) I'm looking for a life partner, a good man that is into me, a man that I can envision settling down with. But after meeting one after another, still zero relationship is built. I couldn't get into man's mind until I found Steve Harvey's book. The book is so amazing, it poked my eyes out, but thankfully it casts me towards enlightenment. I realized I've been doing wrong the whole way, now I had to figure out how to fix it and change my life.

October might become a turning point in my life. It's Shocktober!! There's this turbulence I have to go through. And there's this crossroads I have no idea which way to choose. Getting in-and-out-again of the comfort zone. Planning my dreams, minding my goals, and evaluating my mistakes. And I believe there's always be blessings in disguise. Fallen sick and cannot run for a week, but I find spare time to read more books so I got that going for me, which is nice.

Hence, though it's Shocktober, I am grateful to actually say I've learned a lot :)

Flower Power

Terinspirasi dari buku Robin Sharma tentang The Heart of The Rose, yaitu semacam metode meditasi untuk menentramkan pikiran dengan cara mengkonsentrasikan pandangan pada pusat bunga mawar selama setidaknya lima menit setiap hari, aku pun bertekad membeli bunga mawar setiap minggu dan mulai hunting pasar bunga di Bogor. Di Bogor memang bisa dengan mudah ditemukan toko-toko kebun yang menjual bibit bunga, tapi aku belum pernah menemukan florist yang khusus menjual bunga potong. Baru satu tempat yang aku juga baru tahu ternyata merupakan pasar bunga 24 jam, yaitu di gang kecil persis di sebelah Masjid Raya, dekat dari Stasiun Bogor.

H-3 Lebaran aku mengunjungi pasar tersebut dan terpukau dengan berbagai koleksi bunga cantik yang dijual. Niat awal hanya ingin membeli bunga mawar, jadi tergoda untuk membeli bunga-bunga lainnya. Karena masih awam dan nggak familiar dengan nama-nama bunga, aku menyebut tiap bunga itu berdasarkan warnanya; bunga putih, bunga kuning, bunga pink, bunga ungu muda, bunga ungu tua, dll (ketauan banget ndeso-nya). Perdana banget beli bunga, nggak ngerti harga jadi nggak bisa nawar macem-macem. Sebagian besar bunga dijual per tangkai, bunga mawar misalnya dijual Rp 5,000/tangkai. Memilihnya pun juga sebaiknya lebih cermat karena kita tidak tahu apakah itu bunga lama atau baru. Tapi dasar akunya compulsive buyer, jadi belinya sesuka hati, dimana ada bunga yang mataku nggak bisa lepas memandangnya, itu yang kubeli. Tapi yah semua bunga di pasar itu memang menarik, nggak bosen-bosen melihatnya. Duh seandainya punya duit dua ratus karung pasti kubeli semua itu bunga, bahkan mungkin kubeli juga sekalian ladang-ladangnya (amien!).

Jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama

Pembelian pertamaku meliputi bunga mawar, sedap malam, krisan, dan peacock. Aku sudah membayangkan betapa cantiknya bunga-bunga ini nantinya jika dipajang di ruang tamu, memaniskan suasana Lebaran. Begitu sampai rumah, jeng jeng aku baru menyadari ternyata aku belum punya vas besar. Tangkai bunga-bunga ini begitu panjang hingga terpaksa dipotong setengahnya. Akhirnya bunga-bunga tsb kubagi menjadi tiga buket masing-masing dalam gelas tinggi dan dipajang di ruang tamu, ruang makan, dan kamar mandi. Di antara bunga-bunga tsb, bunga sedap malam yang paling harum. Bunga mawar juga harum tapi tidak sekuat wangi bunga sedap malam, apalagi jika malam menjelang, semakin malam semakin harum wanginya.

Minggu berikutnya aku berniat membeli bunga lagi, namun sayang ada cerita duka. Waktu itu aku lari pagi dari rumah ke lapangan Sempur. Dalam perjalanan aku mampir di pasar Anyar dan membeli bunga krisan putih, sedap malam, daisy, dan lily. Aku paling penasaran dengan bunga lily karena baru kali pertama itu aku melihat wujudnya, walaupun masih kuncup, aku ingin melihat seperti apa bunganya jika sudah mekar. Harganya pun cukup bikin tongpes, Rp 15,000/kuntum. Setelah membeli bunga, aku lanjut lari ke Sempur sambil memegang buket bunga, agak repot memang tapi rasanya happy, seperti membawa obor Olimpiade (haiyah). Begitu sampai di lapangan Sempur, aku meletakkan buket bunga tsb di pinggir lapangan, kemudian lanjut lari keliling track. Ketemu teman-teman sesama pelari, aku pun asyik ngobrol. Begitu mau pulang, aku kembali ke tempat awal menaruh bunga, dan jeng jeng ternyata buketku raib (hiks!). Aku pasang mata mencari jejak pencuri tapi nggak ada tanda-tandanya sama sekali, sejauh mata memandang nggak terlihat ada orang yang kabur kasak-kusuk bawa bunga. Teganya pencuri itu padahal aku sudah pengen banget lihat bunga lily mekar. Karena sedih dengan musibah kecil itu, aku pun lari ngacir pulang dari Sempur sampai ke rumah. Hikmahnya, aku jadi tahu ternyata jarak dari Sempur sampai rumahku itu 6 kilometer. Seandainya buket bunga itu tidak hilang, aku pasti malas lari dan memilih pulang naik angkot.

Beberapa hari kemudian, aku beli bunga lagi (belum kapok). Kebetulan temanku ingin beli bunga buat ibunya yang sedang berulang tahun, jadinya aku ikut-ikutan beli bunga juga. Kali ini bunga yang kubeli tidak banyak, hanya bunga krisan putih dan sedap malam. Kaget juga ternyata harga pasarannya naik seenak jidat. Bunga sedap malam yang sebelumnya kubeli Rp 10,000 dapat 4 tangkai, sekarang hanya bisa dapat 2 tangkai, bunga mawar pun yang tadinya Rp 5,000/kuntum sekarang jadi Rp 15,000/kuntum. Bisnis bunga ternyata gila-gilaan, harganya bisa sangat elastis tergantung supply & demand. Harga bisa dipengaruhi oleh kualitas bunga, jumlah stok, jumlah permintaan, sehingga harganya tidak bisa dipastikan, harga sekarang belum tentu sama dengan harga kemarin. 

Sesampai di rumah, aku teringat belum juga sempat beli vas, akhirnya bunga yang kubeli terpaksa dipajang dalam botol minum. Tantangan yang kupelajari berikutnya adalah tentang bagaimana menyusun bunga. Tidak mudah lho merangkai bunga hidup, salah-salah bunganya bisa layu walaupun sudah direndam air. Menyusun bunga supaya bisa berdiri seimbang juga tidak mudah, walaupun bunga sudah kuputar-putar tapi tetap saja berdirinya mencong kiri/kanan. Tipsnya adalah tidak boleh dipaksakan, memasukkan bunga harus perlahan-lahan agar tidak mendorong bunga lain dan bergesekan dengan dinding vas. Bagian batang yang masuk ke dalam air juga harus dipotong, ujung batangnya pun dipotong miring, dan airnya diganti setiap hari. Jika bunga terlalu crowded di dalam vas nantinya akan sulit tumbuh, kuncupnya tidak akan bisa mekar, malah kelopak bunga dan daun-daunnya bisa rontok. Pantas saja ada ilmu yang namanya Ikebana, yaitu seni menyusun bunga hidup. Bunga memberikan semacam kekuatan yang menenangkan, menambah apresiasi terhadap alam, menghidupkan naluri sabar dan toleransi terhadap perbedaan. Puas rasanya jika berhasil menyusun bunga yang anggun dan pas kombinasinya. Menyusun bunga bisa menjadi momen lebih dekat dengan alam yang menenangkan pikiran, raga, dan jiwa.

Cheesecake

I have a friend. I met her on Instagram. We never met one another in real life because she lives on the other side of the globe but we have the same interest. You know that 25 percent of women think about food every 30 minutes, me and my friend are woman, so our common interest is nothing but food J

One day, she posted a picture of cheesecake she just made. I commented her, "How lovely is that! Mind to share your secret recipe?" She replied, "Why yes, dear, in fact it's so easy baking cheesecake! All you need is butter, eggs, milk, flour, cheese and sugar!" Then she described the cooking instructions briefly.

Ah! If that as easy as it sounds, I can make that one too! Shortly after, I went to the kitchen preparing all ingredients and started cooking. I stroke ten eggs, melted one block of butter, shredded one block of cheese, took one full spoon of ovalet (cooking emulsifier), a cup of milk and a saucer of sugar. I blended all of them in one large bowl using a mixer. While mixing the batter, my wild imagination went picturing how beautiful my cheesecake would be. I would upload the picture on Instagram and everybody would love and envy.

I mixed the batter for half an hour, then I poured it into the baking pan and set the timer for half an hour. After 30 minutes, I peeked inside the oven, nothing's change, okay let's set the timer again for another 30 minutes. After the long wait, I put it off the oven. I saw the cheesecake turned yellowish, it was so beautiful (on the surface!). I flipped the baking pan upside down but the cake was stuck, apparently the bottom of the cake was burnt...

Ah never mind! Although the cake is burnt, the taste must be really good!

Ewh, what kind of cheesecake is this?! The flavor is kinda… abstract!

For the first 15 minutes, the cake was thick and spongy, but after that, it collapsed and the cake became soggy. I found that my cheesecake was a huge mistake.

Then I put the cheesecake in the fridge. I hope my brothers or anyone at home who was hungry would dare to eat it. In the following week, I checked the fridge again. Apparently nobody touched the cake L

I took the poor cake out of the fridge.

"Oh I am sorry, cheesecake, but you're too abstract. I cannot let you stay forever in the fridge! I have to let you go."

Eventually the cake was dumped in the trash bin.

I felt sorry for the cheesecake, but from the experience I learned that sometimes I might be overconfidence in making something and underestimate the circumstances at the same time. I didn’t measure the ingredients. I put all of it based on my ‘feelings’.

Although my Instagram friend said how easy it is to bake cheesecake, but I shouldn’t have taken it for granted. I should have Googled other cheesecake recipes, made comparisons, not solely depending to my friend’s recipe, so I wouldn’t had wasted my time and energy, and won’t had shipwrecked my mom’s kitchen.

Also I learned that there’s no such thing as an instant success. Baking cheesecake is not the same like cooking Indomie.  We live in a world that wants everything right now. People just want the result without having to do the hard work. But life simply does not work that way. We have to embrace the process.

My cheesecake may not be perfect, but in the time being, I learn from the failure to make better choices, better decisions and better me J

My imaginary cheesecake

My Virtual Gallery

I love beautiful things. Instagram has helped satisfying my desire of collecting beautiful pictures. I browse it everyday, letting myself lost in the cyberspace. I discovered there are so many genius artworks published by names I never heard of. I started following them, people who are completely strangers, but whom I fell in love to because of their passionate works. "IG artists", I call them. They come from different countries, age and professions. Some of them are photographers, designers, curator, florist, and calligrapher. Some others are simply collectors of handicraft, kawaii stationary, and fancy fashion.

Just by seeing their collections of artwork, my heart would settle in peace. I love seeing perfect composition of colors, either it come from photography shots, water color selections, flower bouquets, or even food presentations. I feel like strolling in a live gallery, filled with thousand collections I'm willing to stay and stare at it for hours.

My most favorite artist is @emteemte. As far as I know, he graduated from Jakarta Institute of Arts, now working as freelance illustrator. He's talented, I notice he's the most persevering one among other artists. The mood in his drawings always at stable, especially when he draws comics and storybooks. Unique characters combined with amazing colors that he created, seemed like casting a spell, igniting imaginations.

Perusing drawings on Instagram won't bore me, it contagiously revives my imagination. I've felt like I want to draw too, I've bought a pocket-size drawing book to fill my spare time doodling. And I realized that my drawing skill has dropped to kindergarten level, lol! When I was in school, I could draw a complete human body, but now I spend at least 30 minutes practice just to draw man's face. In school, I had lots of time to daydream and doodle while listening to the teacher, which benefited my drawing skill. But since I graduated and started working in a company, I seldom use pencil, my hands seem reluctant to draw.

I used to draw anime at third grade. Seeing my peculiar hobby, my mom sent me to private drawing course. The teacher was an elder, a naturalist painter. His house is full with large size paintings. The biggest one was put in the living room, a portrait of orang utan, rumor has it that the painting was sold for 40 million rupiah. I never knew that a painter could become a millionaire.

I went to the course every Wednesday afternoon, the class filled with 4-6 kids from my neighborhood. The classroom was placed at the attic. It was a beautiful attic! There were a ceiling fan, large window, a big shelf filled with painting equipment, stack of best quality canvasses, four tripod easels, and piles of work-in-process painting. As I stepped into the attic, typical odors of Rembrandt oil wafted around the room. My favorite part was the north facing window, it gives diffused light at a sane color temperature, afternoon breeze would gently stroke the wind chimes. Then we would sit on tatami, started painting in soothing mood.

I still remember the first lesson was to draw a panoramic view with crayons. Then I learned how to draw with water colors. Continued learning to draw with charcoal pencil, and eventually I learned to draw with oil paint. Of all the mentioned tools, in my opinion, the most challenging one is water colors. It's difficult to get the right mix of water and colors, I had to wait it dry and it cannot be erased from paper. I would prefer painting with oil paint instead of water colors.

The course was eventually closed down when my teacher suffering strokes. I could see tremor in his right hand. We brought our last paintings home, considering to continue painting at home, but I missed the attic. If you come to my house, you will see my paintings hang on the wall, most of the objects are flowers and scenery, not much. There's one painting I haven't finish it to date, a picture of two robin birds. The coloring was all done except one spot, the feet. I had no idea how to draw bird's feet. I feel sorry for the robins, I wish I could draw their feet. I wanted to start painting again, yet haven't got time to re-collect my old painting tools. Or perhaps, I should buy ones, because I totally forgot where the last time I put my oil tubes and palette and things, lol.

Meanwhile, I really enjoy browsing beautiful works uploaded on Instagram. I suppose God must have created two kinds of men. Ones are destined to capture beauty, and the other ones are meant to enjoy it. Here's a few of my favorite collections from Instagram feed. If you want to discover tons of more creative people, follow @joshjohnson. The curating team posts impressive collections and writes review about it under hashtag #JJ. It's not just about connecting, it's about inspiring each others and making friends :)

@tulipinadesign

@moonlightice

@thedailyroe

@ayangcempaka

@parisinfourmonths

@mattglastonbury

@emteemte

Bali Weekend Getaway

So here's the thing. Me and my girls came up with the idea of going to Bali as weekend getaway. I've never been to Bali before, and I'm so excited I finally made it. Carrying only one backpack and tote bag, I met my friends at the airport. We arrived way too early, the flight was supposed to be on 7.30 pm (got delayed for 40 mins) but we had already checked in at 4.30. No problem. Girls always had a way to kill the time, some selfies and exposure of what-shoes-we-wear-today would do just great :)

At 11 pm we arrived at Ngurah Rai airport, we took a rental car and headed to Sanur to stay in friend's house. On the next day, we headed to Klungkung, a small regency famous for its classic Balinese paintings. One of my friends had already planned to visit the art market to buy wholesale local fabrics for re-selling purposes. Klungkung market has hundreds of traditional stalls selling hand-woven fabrics, religious paraphernalia, ceremonial umbrellas, and lots of golden colored items for shrines. My friends got busy in price bargaining with merchants, jumped in and out from one stall to another, looking for exquisite fabrics with good price deals. As I don't understand that kind of business, I went on to another place in Klungkung.

Adjacent to the market, there's a beautiful palace called Puri Semarapura. It was built during dynasty of Gelgel kingdom in 17th century. During the Dutch colonial, the palace was largely destroyed in 1908 conquest, leaving the basic remains of the palace which called "Kertagosa", the court of justice. The palace was built in square form and divided in several blocks with various ritual and practical functions. The most interesting thing is some of the finest examples of classic Balinese mural painting depicted on the ceilings of each pavilions. The paintings took the story from the sacred book of Sutasoma, depict journey of human life from birth to death, not to mention karma and reincarnation. I was a bit terrified looking at the paintings, they're mostly dominated with red color, presenting dreadful characters, illustrating kinds of punishment in the hell. In one pavilion, there are antique chairs and table set where trials used to be conducted. There is also a museum of history and culture of Klungkung.

The following day was beach time! We had so much fun at Balangan beach. The sands felt a bit coarse, every steps become saggy and heavy. I learned that every beach could have different types of white sands even though they are in the same island. After Balangan, we continued to Padang-padang, a more secluded but crowded with coral reef and tourists. The reef looks pretty from distance but if you take a closer view, it has pungent surface. If you fall accidentally over it, you might get serious injuries, always be careful with your steps. In Padang-padang, we saw plenty of seaweed living widespread behind the reef.

 

The next beach would be Jimbaran, but we planned to stop for a while at Garuda Wisnu Kencana (GWK) to watch Kecak dance, which unfortunately didn't perform on that day. We couldn't find helpful information about the show until one receptionist gave us a small piece of paper, evidently Kecak dance is scheduled only on every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday evening. The entrance fee is quite expensive for just seeing giant sculptures, so we ended up with mini photo session before the abandoned cut cliffs. Rumor has it that GWK will be the largest statue in the world (150 meters tall & 64 meters wide) but has been going nowhere in the development since 1998. I hope it would be resurrected real soon!

We then rushed to Jimbaran beach to catch up the sunset. We had a very nice seafood dinner, thanks to Ndee's parents. We waited for sunset but again unfortunately thick clouds masked the sun we barely see any twilight over the horizon. However, the mood was on set seeing the beautiful landscape; low tide and soft sand. When it was getting dark we could see all restaurants lit candles on each tables. Since we came in group, not in couples, the romantic mood was left aside and selfies taken over the night.

After having dinner, we continued driving to the city craving for ice cream. Someone said that there's a famous homemade ice cream vendor in Bali called Gourmet Garage. We searched the address thoroughly from Jimbaran to Sanur but couldn't find it. The reviews we got from internet said the place is secluded and kinda difficult to see it from the main road. Not giving up in ice cream hunting, we strolled to Seminyak. Apparently Seminyak has more new cool places than Legian, the sidewalks are also less crowded with pedestrians. We jumped excitedly when we discovered Lello Lello Gelato, a very comfy bar to hang out and enjoy gelato! It's located across from Samaya Resort, offers 24 selections of organic ice cream and sorbets. The place is homey, liquors and coffee are also available, hand towels are provided replacing tissues for practical cleaning. A must visit place to stop by after dinner!

On last day, we expected nothing but seeing sunrise in Sanur beach. We set alarm before dawn, woke up from bed with blurry face, skipped shower and drove to the beach right away. Blame to rainy weather, all we could see was giant dark clouds covering the sun (why oh why). Short after, we browsed Sanur looking for breakfast. Local restaurants were still closed in that morning, we ran out of options to eat, so we then stranded at 24-hours McDonalds.

After breakfast, we got busy packing luggage for our flight home in the afternoon. Before arriving at the airport, we stopped by at Discovery beach for lunch. Discovery has calm waves and sea breeze but no white sands, only hundreds of limestone stacked along the shorelines. The time seemed like frozen at that moment, the sea sounds like calling us to stay forever in Bali, pleading to not ever going back to Jakarta.

I heart you, Bali ❤

Twenty-Fourteen

 

So here comes 2014, a year that perhaps could become a turning point in my life. There are several possibilities why I would say like that:
1. I might be no longer live in Bogor
2. My career path might change
3. I might be travelling a lot
4. I've been taking routine exercises seriously
5. I've been writing blog seriously too (yeah!)
6. I've been reading books that used to be put as 'want-to-read' in shelf

Last but not least, I'm keeping my fingers crossed to achieve personal goals this year ahead. Compare to last year's goals, they're now more specific and in timely fashion. The biggest challenge is to keep the goals on track which I had to get this lazy ass off and work till my bones ache, and to always remember this from actual advice mallard.... lol...

2013 Year-End Short Trip

It was my first time having solitary backpacking trip to Kudus & Ungaran. With the help of GPS and frequent check on reviews from Google, I managed to arrive at destination safely. I stayed at my friend's house, Chira, who has been living in Kudus for about a year.

Kudus is a small town at Central Java that is widely known as the birthplace of Kretek, the legendary sweet, spice scented Indonesian clove cigarettes that has become world renowned. To explore the history, we went to Museum Kretek, the only cigarettes museum in Indonesia that displays fascinating collections from early development of cigarettes industry. There are various of traditional equipment and machinery used to make modest (klobot) cigarettes, not to mention other kinds of modern technology used to produce cigarettes filter. Also, there are collections of expensive promotional materials used to promote the brand. It shows how cigarettes business took major role in local civilization.

Kudus also played a pivotal part in the spread of Islam in Java cultural history. It is said that Kudus is the only place in Java that has permanently acquired an Arabic name 'al-Quds'/Jerusalem/The Holy (City). One historical landmark that still remains to date is Masjid Menara, an old mosque that preserves the tomb of Sunan Kudus, one of the nine Islamic saints of Java/Wali Songo. When we got there, the place was crowded with pilgrims, we couldn't enter the cemetery so we took pictures of the tower only. It preserves pre-Islamic architectural forms, combining old Javanese split doorways with ancient Majapahit style red brickwork and three-tired pyramidal roof.

Soon after we continued to the next excursion, Monthel Waterfall, which located at Colo. It's hidden in precipitous terrain in the mountains of Muria. We had to walk on foot for about 1.5 km to reach it from the parking point. I had to say the track is not safe, it's treacherous, narrow and slippery, some parts of it are directly facing to the cliff underneath. However, the scenery is quite pretty.

Our next destination was Bandengan Beach in Jepara. We thought it wouldn't be much far from Colo, but surprisingly our driver took a detour. Instead of going back to Kudus (which is nearer to Jepara), we drove to Pati which definitely three times more distant. It took 4 hours driving to eventually arrive at destination. Luckily we were happened to pass kinds of breathtaking view along the way. We saw beautiful fields of sugar cane and stopped by to take pictures.

Kudus is a lovely small town I absolutely want to visit again someday. Tips: if you're planning to visit Kudus, remember to try local cuisines, such as Soto Kerbau, Lenthog and Garang Asem. They're savory!

Follow Your Heart

I couldn't be happier than this. A colleague from Stuttgart, Susanne, sent me this, a novel titled "Follow Your Heart" by Susanna Tamaro. We've been writing one another emails for about a year. We shared secrets and stories. Though we've never met each other yet, but I feel grateful knowing her. She's twice elder than me, a gentle and wise lady indeed. The book she gave is a perfect gift for my reading appetite.

The novel is about confession of an elderly woman before her approaching death. She wrote letters to granddaughter she raised but now estranged and living in far-off America. It's a story of love, of words unspoken, of lives wasted, of disclosure of truth and lie, of wisdom and inspiration.

I cried a lot reading it. Sometimes I went too emotional, I would stopped at any page, waited for few days to eventually move on to the next page. Many parts of the story resembles to mine. I've no idea whether it's just coincidence or the nature takes its course, but I had similar incidents with the story. Reading the book made me understand how it feels like for an elderly woman to face daughter’s callousness. There are so much lessons from the story, it took me a while to brood over my own life. Have I completely followed my heart?

One part I really like the most is at the ending where there’s written:

“When so many roads open up before you, you don’t know which way to take, don’t pick one at random, sit down and wait…. Stay still, be quiet, and listen to your heart. Then, when it speaks, get up and go where it takes you.”

Dancing In The Rain

Meet Ely, my friend in Toastmasters club who has inspired me to create meeting theme called "Dancing In The Rain". You know why would people want to learn to dance in the rain? Because they don't just wait for bad things in their life to go away, instead, they take challenges head on, to face the inevitable storms of life and enjoy the journey.

What makes Ely special to me? It's her life journey, that she had been struggling to keep moving forward, all the way in doing what she believes. She joined Toastmasters a year ago, as she shared her story in her BM3 project, that she had trough many difficult situations, that eventually made her wiser.

Ely is a doctor. What inspired her to become a doctor is her mother who's suffering long-time illness. When she was pursuing her degree, she realized that she had no money, so she did everything to save money, to pay her medical school tuition. She took private course teachings, she taught almost every subjects, Mathematics, Physics, Chemistry, and even Accounting.

Often she felt extremely tired, with the conditions she had in her school and home, that she felt want to give up. Until one day she met her father's best friend who dropped inspiring line.

He told her, "I've never seen a girl with such heavy rain her eyes like you, my dear. Keep dancing in the rain and I believe that she who had the most heaviest rain will bring the most beautiful rainbow".

From that moment, she always kept in mind to embrace any problems, to face it instead of waiting for it to go away. Learn yourself to dance in the rain, that way you'll notice there's a beautiful rainbow over the rain.

My 25 Birthday

I'm turning 25 this year! Let me tell you what I got on my birthday:

1. Numerous birthday greetings from friends, some of them were long-lost-friends who surprisingly remembered my birthday. I'm glad that we could still keep in touch. And when I opened Google, I found this.

2. Mysterious cupcakes delivery, the sender was unknown. I couldn't believe my eyes to receive sweet thing like this.

3. Birthday cake from my office. It's a tiny chocolate cream cake along with a greeting card. Small but sweet.

4. A birthday present from my best friend who lives out of town. It's a sweet smelling perfume which I like it very much!

What's next?

I'm 25 now, I'm grateful yet restless to realize that I'm facing a bit of quarter life crisis. I feel like hesitated about what I was doing and am looking forward for advises. Is it just me or other people feel the same too? Luckily I got inspiration here in which I agree to some extent, so I made a shorter list for self to keep in mind.

Here are seven things I want to always remember at 25:

1. Be grateful, make time for everyone you love. Never become someone who just gets too "busy". Enjoy getting to know everyone, stop grouching and being sarcastic. Let the guard down to fall in love and let someone fall in love with you. Even if it ends in heartbreak, it's still one of the greatest adventures you've been on.

2. Don't go on Facebook so much because it's waste of time. Stop comparing yourself to others. You do you, and you're good with that.

3. Work on your posture. Remember that you'll thank yourself for young look & healthy body when you're 70.

4. You know how to cook a health meal. Stop eating instant noodles, your body doesn't like it.

5. Keep writing. Know that some of the things you write maybe look bad, but write anyway. Write because it makes you happy. Remember that sometimes, on very occasions, the things you write might be more powerful than you would have ever thought possible.

6. Read more books. Not just reading blogs or online articles, shut down your computer every once in a while and pick a real book.

7. Travel the world as often as money and time will allow because those experiences are priceless and they fill your soul.

All is well~

Warming Up!

It's been a year I had nothing to post. But this year, I've put "To start blog writing regularly" in my 2013 Bucket List, in which that I should fulfill my promise. I should have been updating my blog every day, but to make it easy to start, I think I'm gonna write just once a week, with any kind of posting that come cross to mind, and it may be delivered in English or Bahasa. Why would I want to do this? Because I've learned that having writing skills is as important as speaking skills. Writings can also have power to inform, persuade, or inspire people just like hearing good speeches. I've deliberately become a member of Toastmasters Club in town to learn and to develop my public speaking skills. And I want to make it balance with writing skills, to express my thoughts, and to enhance self-esteem. How to do that? By repeated actions (to write on regular basis), I believe that practice makes perfect eventuality. Ganbatte!!! *pom pom*

Re-Defining My Wish List

Hello, cyber friends!

Have i told you about my dreams? You might have seen it before on the left pane of this blog, it's titled wish list. You may wonder what happened now to those dreams? Have i accomplish them all? Well, here we go analyzing the results:

1. Travel to new places

Well i have not been travelled much. All i could do is exploring Jakarta and i’m getting used to the traffic hours and train schedules. Places i went to for the first time are Pondok Indah Mall and Jalan Bangka. Thank goodness, i have friends who gave directions, or else i might have completely lost. I texted them everytime i found crossroads. Jakarta is such a confusing labyrinth but i like the adventure to dive in even deeper.

2. Gain more friends

I’m not sure whether the number of my friends are really increasing or not. However, by the time being, i learn to differ exactly which friends who are sincere and those who are just pretending.

3. Intensive writing

This one has not done very well. I was too busy working on my thesis and haven’t touch my blogs ever since. But now i have spare time to confess my thoughts into words and update my blogs.

4. Learn piano

Guess what? I learn piano with my friend’s electric keyboard. She has a Casio keyboard in her room which she didn’t play for quiet long. I borrow it for a week and learn by myself. The lcd display on it taught me a lot, from finger techniques to song practices. So far, i have memorized 4 songs to play with: How Deep Is Your Love, A Whole New World, Happy Birthday, and Swan Lake. Oh..i wish i have my own keyboard, so i can practice every day before bedtime.

5. Yoga rehearsal

Aaahh…i couldn’t cope for this one. I only stand for a month, practicing yoga at Ananda Marga, but when the instructor was replaced, i can’t continue. Moreover, since the breakup, i don’t have anyone to accompany me to the club which is quite far from Depok.

6. Get fabulous hair

Since i found out the right comb techniques, my hair has grown beautifully. Now i have a long, thick, wavy, glowing brown hair! No more fall-out hair strand. I think i just need to have creambath more often because my hair dries easily, especially in sunny day.

7. Have lasik surgery

Yes, this one has completely done. I’ve spent my 3-years saving for the surgery. Though my visions have not 100% recovered yet, but i’m grateful for not using eyeglasses anymore. This new look has helped me to build confidence. I love myself than ever before!

I’m taking these wishes as half completed. So, i’d like to re-define my wish list into something more real. I hope by writing my dreams, it help me to becoming what i have wanted to be. Here are the new resolutions:

1. Be a nice, low-profile, and sincere person

2. Read more books and write the synopsis on blog

3. Buy a Casio keyboard

4. Finish thesis by the end of June

5. Improve TOEFL score

6. Learn cooking

7. Be a professional dancer

Rani Ramayanti

-dream on until the dream comes true-

New Year, New Eyes, New Spirit!

Hello there! Phew, after a week I couldn’t see my own writing, now my eyes are gradually settled, but still I haven’t catch the clearest vision yet for long distance objects. YES, BABY! I HAD LASIK SURGERY!! I have waited patiently for THREE YEARS, saved my money for 300k per month, studied for Lasik references, and at last I had my own on Jan 24, 2011! Mark that date, buddy, because it was a historic experience in my lifetime. Finally I made my dreams come true! Bye-bye eye glasses! Hello beauty and self-esteem! 

*\('⌣'*\) *\(ˇ▽ˇ)/* (/*'⌣')/*

Let me tell you how the operation goes. Having my first surgery was quite a nervous breakdown ever. I was almost freaked out. I entered the operation room with hands shaking. The scenes were similar with drama movies/sitcoms. There were large lightning, surgery bed, a huge machine, a plate full of injections and weird things. I thought I was facing the angel of death. My mouth mumbled in prays, begging the Lord for mercy, wishing the doctor for not poking my eyes out.

Ten minutes later, I walked out the operation room, headed for a couch to rest on. I didn’t feel anything. But I’m pretty sure I SAW EVERYTHING. I saw how the nurse applied anesthesia on both of my eyes, the other prepared the laser beam to activate, and the doctor gently cut the flap of my cornea. The laser shot went for 10 seconds. I just had to look directly at one point, a red dot that appeared to be electrifying and had burning smells. The 10 minutes surgery felt like 10 hours for me.  I went home that day.

A week post-surgery I spent totally at home, in process of healing my vision. I put artificial teardrop every one hour so the surface of cornea are all wet and cleared off dust. I wear sunglasses outdoor. The hospital gave me this fancy sunglasses, makes me want to run and escape to the beach. J

Defying Gravity

Something has changed within me

Something is not the same

I'm through with playing by the rules

Of someone else's game

Too late for second-guessing

Too late to go back to sleep

It's time to trust my instincts

Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try

Defying gravity

I think I'll try

Defying gravity

Kiss me goodbye

I am defying gravity

And you won’t bring me down!

I'm through accepting limits

'cause someone says they're so

Some things I cannot change

But till I try, I'll never know!

Too long I've been afraid of

Losing love I guess I've lost

Well, if that's love

It comes at much too high a cost!

I'd sooner buy

Defying gravity

Kiss me goodbye

I'm defying gravity

I think I'll try

Defying gravity

And you won’t bring me down!

I'd sooner buy

Defying gravity

Kiss me goodbye

I'm defying gravity

I think I'll try

Defying gravity

And you won't bring me down!

bring me down!

ohh ohhh ohhhh!

This Might Be A Very Very Very Personal Statement

I learn English since primary school. Textbooks are not working for me. I learn by singing and watching Hollywood movies. I might be the most typical girl who happened to live in the Third World country, adoring Johnny Depp & Lady Gaga, following every single episode of Glee, and thanking Google Translate every time I found difficult words. I thought I’ve enough enriching vocabularies in my brain by doing that. But oh I still have flaws in speaking and writing! Even while I’m writing this piece, I read ‘Guidance to Write a Success Personal Statement’ book. Though most of my days I spent by tweeting and blogging to enhance my writing skills, but hell I have no reader. Nobody is willing to be grammarian, unless they’re paid to. Then I decided to write anything whatever sentences that first come to mind, struggling against my grammar phobia. On the other hand, I need to sharpen my speaking skills. One day I joined Toastmasters club in my campus. The club aims for good. It is devoted to develop local communities in public speaking and leadership skills. I’ve completed the Leadership Track but failed in the Communication. I knew it since the first time I got there, half of the members are lecturers, and they’re all professors! My legs were already broke when they asked me to come forward and deliver my speech. Apparently I haven’t found the courage yet to overcome this anxiety.

I’m certain the best way to master English is to get fully involved in the English language country. By participating in IELSP program, obviously I shall interact with the American folks, and by interacting, I mean I shall foster my English as well. This is a great chance for people who always wanted to experience what it feels like living in United States, people like me! This is the most wanted scholarship. I know there are zillions of applicants out there nailing their dreams on this opportunity. It seems, when this moment of consciousness come, I’m afraid my application will be just ended in paper shredder. But what’s the point of living when I give up so easily? If I fail, I could, of course, wait for the next chance, and while waiting, I could read old copies of People and watch Grey’s Anatomy without subtitles.

Sometimes it is much easier to fantasize the future rather than taking a real step on it. My vision is to be an anchorwoman on VOA. It’s a challenging yet needed extra guts to achieve it. I always imagine myself in front of the cameras, presenting breaking news or a culinary section. My parents won’t be worried because they can see me from the telly. I think I’m already stepping on the crossroads. Whichever direction I take will lead me to my destiny. This program is a signboard pointing at my destination. I don’t know whether the road is going to be rocky or slippery, but this is going to be a fascinating journey worth to try. 

Wedding in Paris

i always dreamed for my wedding day. i can imagine myself facing a wide and beautiful scenery w/ my husband. yet i don't know where the ceremony should be placed until i saw the wedding pictures which were shot for Harper's Bazaar wedding edition. those pictures are just beautiful. and i want to experience those romances too. this pic i found on FB has ignites my desire to have a wedding in Paris. the Eiffel tower must be having a magic temptation that attracts me to go there. i guess every girl in the world also have dream just like mine. sweet.